It's hard to think that I'm going through what some would call "hard times" these days. I guess there are two ways of looking at my situation. On one hand, I'm unemployed, have my mother living with me, and I'm going through a divorce. Additionally, I'm a single parent struggling to make a huge mortgage payment every month. On the other hand, I'm a writer, have my mother living with me which is a huge help to both of us as she recovers from a lengthy hospitalization, and I'm a single parent who gets to do things like watch my little girl as she grows up.
Earlier this week, Chantí's best friend came over for a playdate. While playing dress-up, they placed a blue quilt on the floor and that was the ocean. They were mermaids. I watched as they sorted through their differences and mimicked those of us around them as one played the role of parent. I have to say - my daughter was a great parent! Their playdate ended up being an all-day affair, with the older sister of my daughter's friend coming over to "babysit" along with my mom that evening while their mom went to a meeting and I went to a jewelry-making class. Upon my return, I opened the the door to music blasting and they were hopping about, dancing in the living room with my mom and the babysitter cheering them on. They were dancing so hard that the bobble-head dogs on top of the entertainment center were bobbling. It's a privilege to get to see these things. Seriously. Not all mom's get to watch their daughter playing dress-up with their best friend. It's hard to slow down and realize what a gift it is to be able appreciate these times. My daughter's friend is another gift. The girls get along famously. One day I'd taken them to the movies. Chantí had the best time, and wanted to save their ticket stubs as a remembrance - but she accidentally left them in the theater. She was distraught, and I listened to her little friend trying to pull her out of her funk. She explained that when she goes to this particular theater with her dad, she sprinkles fairy dust on the car and that makes it go to the donut store, and "Lori, could you maybe stop at the donut shop? I think it would cheer Chantí up, wouldn't it Chantí?" So of COURSE we went to the dount shop even thought it was now well past 7 p.m. and thus far they'd had popcorn and gummy bears for dinner. AND it was a school night.
Today the sun FINALLY came out, after about what seems like months of never-ending rain. I picked Chantí up from school and we went straight to the beach closest to her school. Since we are lucky enough to live on the coast, the beach was four blocks away. It was a beautiful day, and we spent some time playing in the shallowest of the waves. Then we came home and got my mom and took her to a different beach near our home. This visit was monumental for me, because I never thought that I'd see my mom walking down to sit on this particular bench again. And she just marched down that little hill like she owned the place. While she sat on the bench, Chantí and I clambered on down to the beach and looked at tide pools.
My mom is probably healthier than I've seen her in years. She had extensive cardiac surgery in 2001, and she has never really come back from that. (This was her third heart surgery, the first being in 1957.) Now I'm seeing signs of recovery to the extent that I'm daring to think that she is really going to come out of this most recent surgery, a partial hip replacement, with flying colors! The deblitating swelling in her legs is just about gone, and she's staying on her regimen with her medications resulting in her doctor telling her that she looks great, and no she doesn't need to use a walker! It'd be nice to take credit for this, thinking that my mom is so healthy thanks to the great care that I'm giving her, but in reality, I think it can be attributed more to her stubborn disposition and not letting anything ever get her down than to anything else. I suspect being around Chantí and our ever-growing menagerie (one Shih Tzu, one Kliban Cat, a large blue-eyed white rabbit, and a hermit crab) must be having a positive effect. My mom loves animals, and my recently deceased step-father felt otherwise, so my mom has been without a pet for years.
As for work...well, I'm trying to write. But suddenly, now that I have the opportunity I seem to be having trouble knowing where to start. I figure that's due to one of two possibilities, the first being that I'm really THAT boring that there's nothing to say, and the second being that my brain is so cluttered that it's like cleaning house. I just don't know where to start. I figure if I write enough of these blurbs, something is bound to germinate!
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